A Phantasmal Idea

Something that I briefly mentioned a few entries ago, has been weighing on my mind for the past several days. Any who are close to me know, that a few years back, I experienced what some may call a... "possession of inspiration." (alright, only one person has ever called it that, and it wasn't me, but the more I've thought about it, the more it makes sense.)

Years ago, when I first discovered Breaking Benjamin, and specifically discovered the song "Breath," the inklings of what I call... my story, were brought to me. For days I say and listened to certain songs over, and over again. I wrote exhaustive notes, I conferred with other people, seeing if they could hear what I was hearing, hidden behind the words of the songs. Never before had I felt such a driving inspiration to create something.

Yet despite having the story, despite having everything I need, without fail, every time I have sat down to write the tale... I fail. It's as though there is a fleeting bit of the story that eludes me, a phantasmal, half formed notion or idea, that while small, is the keystone of the story. My notes continue to grow, my knowledge of the story continues to be fleshed out by my imagination. Yet I still suffer from the worst case of writer's block I've ever known.

I'm unsure what I'm waiting for, but I pray that I will find it, or that it will find me. Perhaps there are just events in my life that need to take place to inspire pieces of my story. I know that when Alicia and I had our whirlwind beginning of our relationship, several things in the story fell into place. Perhaps that is what I'm waiting for. It is possible that events, and people, in my life will continue to cast illumination on the few remaining shadows of my story, and then at last, I'll be able to write it.

Perhaps at length throughout the course of my blog, I will discuss various aspects of my story, give my loyal readers access to the in depth workings of my creative process. Perhaps not, as you all have probably guessed by now - I'm an unconventional blogger. The Rogue Signal is little more than a collected works of my most random thoughts, and I pray that those who take the time to read it find enjoyment, amusement, and perhaps some form of mental stimulation from reading my words.

So until next time loyal readers, this has been another blogcast of the Rogue Signal. Goodnight, and good luck.